Make Me Money or Make Me Happy: The Only Mantra You’ll Ever Need
Has someone ever cast judgment on one of your personal life choices?
Sure they have. But let me be more specific:
Have you received unsolicited criticism for delegating or outsourcing chores or mundane life tasks? Doing your laundry, cleaning your house, mowing your lawn, shoveling your driveway, cooking your food, doing your own taxes, caring for your children (there’s one that inspires a whole heap of judgement!). Seemingly everyone has an opinion about how you spend your time and your money, and far too many people feel emboldened enough to communicate that opinion.
From your nosy neighbor to your date to your mother-in-law, we (and women in particular) are the frequent recipients of judgy comments about what we should and should not be doing, by people whose lives and pocketbooks are in no way affected by our choices.
While you can’t convince others to stop their preaching, you can adopt and recite this mantra:
If it doesn’t make me money or make me happy, I will eliminate or reduce it.
This has been my guiding principle since I was a poor graduate student with neither money nor time. I was no stranger to scarcity, but I knew I only had so much bandwidth, and I had to prioritize the projects and activities that deserved my attention. So to really assess what would help me get ahead and thrive, I had to get realistic about the value of my own time.
Let me repeat that: My time is valuable. And so is yours.
In my personal hierarchy of time management, here are a few examples of what I prioritize:
Doing work I love / spending quality time with people I love / taking care of myself
Literally everything else.
It’s really that simple. I’m fortunate to love the work I do, so it isn’t a sacrifice or a burden to prioritize it equally with my social and self-care time. If I am not healthy, I can’t be of service to anyone, including myself. And connection — real connection — is my raison d'être.
In other words: The things that make me money and make me happy are the only things I want to be doing.
Now, like most of us, I haven’t yet reached the truly baller state of existence where I can completely eliminate everything else. BUT, I try. Reaaaaaalllllly hard, through both delegation and strategic efficiency.
So what does that look like in action? Well, for example…
I have a virtual assistant who handles most of my admin tasks.
I order many things online to minimize shopping time.
I hire someone to clean my damn house.
And most importantly: I do all of these things (and more) unapologetically. Why? Because my time and happiness are worth it. Those small investments get me more projects, more joy, more love, more money, just MORE.
Some call it selfish. Or spoiled. I call it smart.
If I’m not convincing you, just remember that Bill Gates, one of the richest people in the world, when asked “how he does it all,” simply answered: “I don’t mow my own lawn.”
Touché, Gates. Touché.
You might be saying, “Yeah, but that lifestyle is price prohibitive.” And for some, yes, it is. For now. But for many professionals, it’s less about the money and more about your own mental hurdles. (Reminder: I was living in financial poverty when I started implementing this mantra.)
Because it isn’t just others who judge: Chances are, you’re also judging yourself.
I’m far from the first person to promote the value of delegation, but many remain unconvinced, or pass it off as a luxury for “someday,” once they’ve “made it.” When in reality, it is a crucial piece of the puzzle to help you make it.
My hope is that maybe, just maybe, this simple mantra will give you the courage you need to never again defend or question the value of your own time and the choices you make to optimize it.
I made a promise to myself years ago to play at a high level. I’m not seeking mediocrity, so I want to maximize every minute. No one judges the Bill Gates of the world for not mowing their lawns — so why should you or I be any different?
If you LOVE vacuuming and it relaxes you, or if yard work is a release, then by all means, get your raking on! But be honest with yourself: What truly delights you — and what do you do out of guilt?
Committing wholeheartedly to doing what I love and what makes me money, unburdens me, frees time for me to be present and generous with others, unleashes creativity, clears my head, and elevates my career in ways I could not excel if I remained stuck in a never-ending list of domestic and administrative to-dos.
*Disclaimer*: Don’t expect to sail into the full expression of this mantra overnight. It takes time, but if it is your goal and priority, you will chip away at it and reap its rewards little by little. Dismissing it as simply the stuff of “other people” guarantees you will remain grumpy and stuck and likely never reach your full potential. For most people, it is a choice.
So what makes you happy or makes you money? Make a list. Then make a list of what doesn’t fall into those categories. Get creative and find small ways to start minimizing at least a few of the items on that second list, to create more space for items on the former. Do this for a month and reassess. Then every quarter. Then annually. At every checkpoint, repeat: My time is valuable. My happiness is valuable. This is a necessity, not a luxury.
And — in case you need it — you have my permission to dismiss any person who questions how you prioritize your time and money. They’re thinking small. Use their judgment as your barometer for who is worthy of your time and will join you on your path to growth.
Finally, shout out to all the judgy people who inspired this article. Your criticism will be a source of empowerment for others. May you one day spend as much time liberating yourself via this mantra as you do casting judgement. That is my hope for you.
How do you prioritize choosing to focus on what makes you money or makes you happy? Tell me in the comments. And forward this to someone who needs permission or a gentle push to do the same.